My Dearest Penelope,

I write this letter from many thousand miles away in India, and I miss you terribly. However, this trip was inevitable, the alternative being that I relinquish my post of a Rolls salesman. Let me, therefore, recount the curious, and perhaps amusing, events that have transpired on my visit. Thereafter, I pray that you will forgive me for abandoning you at such short notice.

After a three-week voyage over land and sea, I arrived at the palace for an audience with the Maharaja who had bought ten Silver Ghosts at our showroom in London. I had a letter of apology, penned by the General Manager of Rolls Royce himself. The need for an apology, moreover in-person, had had me puzzled though.

I must admit that the Maharaja’s palace rivals the best in England. However, unaccustomed to foreign hours, and climate, I woke up early the next morning. To my surprise, the Maharaja was waiting for me in the lawns, ready with breakfast, and appeared oddly familiar. So, after the pleasantries, I asked: “Have I seen you before, Your Majesty?”

“It is certainly possible.” I sensed a hint of mischief in his smile. “Perhaps in a photograph?”

“Yes perhaps, but I meant not in your regalia–”

“You do have a keen eye but not a memory to match.” The Maharaja laughed and proceeded to wave his attendants away. Then he stood up and took off his outer robe and headgear, standing before me as a common man. That was the moment, my dear Penelope, that a dread engulfed me.

This was the same gentleman whom I had refused to sell a car to, a day before he purchased them all, as providence would have it, on my weekly day off. In my defence, he was then dressed as a commoner and I had assumed he couldn’t afford an automobile. But I digress.

As the Maharaja ate with impeccable western manners, I extended the letter of apology to him.

“Please read it to me.” He requested and I proceeded to comply. When I had finished, he abandoned his breakfast, stood up, and cheerfully exclaimed. “Would you care to see how we keep our city clean, Mr. Banks?”

I had been expecting an angry repartee. Instead, I was puzzled yet intrigued by his offer. I nodded and dutifully followed him, trailing a few paces behind. Soon we were at the palace gates where all the Silver Ghosts were ready for daily garbage collection.

It was then that the purpose of the apology letter became crystal clear to me.

I hope to see you soon.

With love,
Gregory